Well now, in a cozy little kingdom, not too different from where you might live, except perhaps with more castles, there lived twelve fellows. These weren't just any fellows; they were champions of taking it easy. They believed that doing nothing was the best kind of something.

One sunny afternoon, they were all lounging under a big oak tree, not doing much of anything, as usual.
"You know," began the first, yawning widely, "if I'm supposed to lie down, I just flop. If there's a stone under me, well, it can stay. Why bother moving?"
"Ha!" chuckled the second. "If I'm eating and I drop my spoon, I just leave it. Bending down is far too much trouble. I'll wait until someone else picks it up."
The third stretched, very slowly. "If I see a task that needs doing, like, say, mending a fence, I just look the other way. Eventually, the fence might mend itself, or someone else will get tired of looking at it."
"If I'm thirsty," said the fourth, "and my cup is empty, I just wait. Maybe it will rain into my mouth, or perhaps my thirst will go away on its own."
The fifth, who was lying flat on his back, added, "If I have to walk somewhere, and the path is a bit muddy, I'd rather sit down and wait for the sun to dry it than get my shoes dirty. Or, better yet, wait for someone to carry me."
"If I'm told to fetch water from the well," piped up the sixth, "I take the smallest bucket. Less to carry, you see. And I walk very, very slowly. The water won't run away."
The seventh, who had his eyes closed, mumbled, "If my hat falls off, it can stay off. The sun feels nice anyway. Or maybe the wind will blow it back on."
"If I'm supposed to chop wood," said the eighth, "I find the thinnest twig. One chop, and I'm done! Then it's time for a nap."
The ninth chimed in, "If a door is closed, I don't bother opening it. I just wait. Someone is bound to come along and open it eventually."
"If I'm meant to sweep the floor," said the tenth, "I just swish the broom in one spot. It looks like I'm busy, but really, I'm just moving a tiny bit of dust around."
The eleventh, who was leaning against the tree, said, "If I'm asked to guard something, I just close my eyes. If I can't see any trouble, then there isn't any trouble, right?"
And the twelfth, with a big sigh, concluded, "Honestly, all this talking about not doing things is making me tired. I think I'll just rest here until dinner."

Now, who should be passing by but the Queen herself! She hadn't heard everything, only bits and pieces.
When she heard the first say, "If there's a stone under me, well, it can stay," she thought, "My, what a dedicated worker! He doesn't let minor discomforts stop him!"
When she heard the second say, "Bending down is far too much trouble," she thought he meant he was too focused on important tasks to be bothered by small things. "Such focus!" she marveled.
And so it went. She heard "look the other way" and thought, "He avoids distractions!" She heard "wait for it to rain into my mouth" and thought, "How resourceful, using nature!" She misinterpreted every single lazy boast as a sign of incredible diligence and cleverness.
"Wonderful!" she declared, stepping out from behind a bush. "You are just the sort of hardworking, sensible men I need to work in my palace! You're all hired!"

The twelve men looked at each other, their eyes wide with panic. Work? In a palace? That sounded like a lot of effort!
"But... Your Majesty," one stammered, "we're not sure we're..."
"Nonsense!" said the Queen. "I heard you! You're perfect! Report to the palace tomorrow morning!"

The next day, the twelve new servants arrived at the palace, looking very glum. They decided their only hope was to be so bad at their jobs that the Queen would send them away.
The first was told to polish the royal boots. He just stared at them. "I'm contemplating the best angle for the shine," he said. Hours later, the boots were still dull. The Queen, however, thought, "He's so thorough, planning his work with such care!"
The second was asked to fetch the Queen a glass of water. He took a tiny thimble, walked at a snail's pace, and spilled most of it. "I was being extra careful not to slosh, Your Majesty," he explained. "Such delicate precision!" the Queen exclaimed.
The third was told to weed the garden. He pulled one tiny weed and then lay down. "I'm observing the soil to understand the root system fully," he announced. "A true scholar of horticulture!" the Queen praised.

No matter how little they did, or how badly they did it, the Queen always found a way to see it as something wonderful. If they took all day to dust one table, she'd say, "Such attention to detail!" If they fell asleep while guarding a door, she'd remark, "They're so dedicated, they even dream of their duties!"

The twelve lazy servants sighed. It seemed they were stuck. Trying to get fired was even more work than actually doing a tiny bit of work.
So, they stayed at the palace. They didn't exactly become hardworking, oh no. But they did just enough to get by, grumbling quietly to themselves. And the Queen? She went on believing she had the twelve most wonderfully diligent servants in the entire kingdom. And perhaps, in her own way, she was right. They were certainly dedicated... to doing as little as possible!

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